October 2008 Conscious Cconnections Feature article
While on my sort of daily walks, I’ve noticed that the ant hills are getting quite high. I’m wondering if we’re going to have an interesting winter here in Southern Arizona. Ants are very industrious and if you’ve ever watched them they are very persevering. There’s much to admire in their behavior yet if they get in your house or in your food they are quite annoying and can do considerably damage. There are lots of solutions to manage visible ants. How then do you manage those non-tangible and invisible mental ANTs? Yep those Automatic Negative Thoughts ( or sometimes called Another Negative Thought) that pop up every time we are called to go beyond our comfort zones, entertain a new idea or proposal, look at another’s perspective and when we are poised for the next step or level in our personal development. They stop us at the starting line before we even take that first step. They do considerably more damage that can actually last a lifetime.
These ANTs are also very persevering and come in all sorts of disguises:
“I don’t have enough time.”
“Who ever heard of anybody doing that in our family?”
“What if I fail?”
“What will people think?”
“I’m not good at that.”
“What if they say no?”
“I don’t want to embarrass my self?”
“That costs too much.” and the list goes on into judgement and assumptions of other people’s motives, actions, perceptions and behaviors.
These ANTs work on your fears of the unknown. They try to keep you safe in the routine and habits that are familiar to you. They are hardwired into your DNA so will always come up. So the best solution is to come up with an ANT management system that will keep you in a state of expansion rather one of contraction. When you‘re in a state of expansion you are open to the possibilities and can assess the situation from all perspectives and then make a heart felt decision versus one that leaves you feeling guilty or lacking.
There are a plethora (a favorite word) of ways to handle mental ANTs. One mentioned in the video on Change Your Brain, Change Your Life highlights thinking of the negative scenario in all its glory as if you re writing it down on paper then taking it to your virtual shredder and shredding it. This tactic worked for my husband the other night as he was ruminating on a situation when he was trying to go to sleep. He finally decided to try this method and it worked - resulting in a good night’s sleep.
One of the many methods that I’ve used is Byron Katie’s 4 questions. You take your ANT through these 4 questions:
1. Is it true?
2. Can I know (in my infinite knowledge of course) that it is absolutely true?
3. How do I react believing that thought? Where do I feel it?
4. Who would I be without that thought?
Then turn the thought around.
When you find your ANTs driving you crazy and you feel contracted that’s usually a sign to take a break and come back to the situation with more perspective and openness.
Your Homeplay if you should choose to accept it is: The next time you recognize an ANT try out the 4 question method or use your virtual shredder.
Please let me what your experience was like managing your ANTS?
Passion, Simplicity & Joy,
Colleen
Colleen Crook, a Life and Leadership coach and certified facilitator of the Passion Test™, is the founder and owner of Conscious Living Connection and the creator of the 9 step Living Consciously Program with passion and joy.She partners with forward thinking individuals to create what matters authentically and with integrity. Sign up for your fr^^ee mini-e-course on the 5 keys to Conscious Communication at www.consciouslivingconnection.com
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